In the Addendum to Autumn Romance: Stories and Portraits of Love after 50, a section lists the many Advantages to an ‘autumn romance.’ But today I am aware of the one disadvantage — the love affair may be shorter than desired — because one of the individuals featured in Autumn Romance has just passed away.
Richard Passanante, the exuberant and loving partner of Dorothy Salvadore, died in Dot’s arms on Thursday, Sept.30, in Philadelphia.
I feel privileged to have shared Rich and Dorothy's love story in my book (pages 42 -45). Their photographs, by the incomparable Rebecca Barger, are so beautiful because you can see the love and devotion. You can see how their feelings transcend physical boundaries (both pics above by Rebecca Barger)
Rich and Dorothy knew well how to transcend physical limitations. Both were born blind. Both triumphed over steep obstacles; both knew how to see the joy in ordinary everyday moments. They were so delighted with life in general and each other in particular that anyone who saw them got happy.
Laughing was their favorite sport. Rich's humor was irreverent and rollicking. But he was also warmly wise. People could tell him their problems. He was a wonderful listener — and an astute gatherer of interesting facts.
Rich and Dorothy were one of the first interviews I did for Autumn Romance — at the Southwest Senior Center in 2007 — and even though I interviewed over 60 couples after them, I always knew they would be in the final version of the book. Their story--and their souls--were so special: I was exceedingly proud to share them with the world.
As life would have it, I never got around to doing a book signing at the wonderful Southwest Senior Center until just this past week, on Wednesday, Sept. 29. Rich and Dorothy weren’t there but I read their story and everyone smiled in recognition. Then I took off for St. Louis a few hours later. And the very next day, Rich died.
Dorothy gave me the news on Thursday night. The next evening, Friday, Oct. 1, I was scheduled to do a book signing at the University City Public Library in St. Louis. So I read Dorothy and Rich's story again and shared the reason why.
Among the small group at the St. Louis library hearing about Dorothy and Richard was a couple from Illinois — she was 80, he was 84 — who were going to be married three weeks hence. They announced their intention to love each other deeply in the time they had left.
Dorothy and Rich were together only four years. “Everyone thinks we were together longer because we went so well together,” she told me. “But those four years were like a lifetime, because of the love.”
With Dorothy’s permission, I am including her address, so that anyone who wants to, can acknowledge Richard Passanante and Rich and Dorothy's love story: DOROTHY SALVADORE, 3827 Powelton Avenue, Philadelphia, PA 19104
Oh, this makes me so sad. I also lost my beloved (our "Robert & Joan" story is in Carol's book), and nothing can prepare us for the immensity, the profundity, of this loss. I hope Dorothy will take full advantage of the support available to her, especially a grief counselor who can help her make her way through this terrible time. My heart goes out to her.
ReplyDeleteI recently borrowed Autumn Romance from the University City Public Library in St. Louis, and since then I've begun each day by reading one of its wonderfully inspiring stories. I'm in my mid-40s and have yet to find the "love of my life," but this book lets me know that time is still on my side; I have more real love to look forward to than I ever thought possible. Dorothy and Richard's romance in this lifetime might be over, but their love will endure for eternity.
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